they all think (5)
backlogged to a week before i left, published in honour of my commitment to another week of sobriety
love is gracious yet not giving, love is gentle yet not sweet, love sounds like the voices falling silent, love sounds a lot like quitting often times i wonder, how people look at us, do they see what i see, love, love so innocent love, admiration and little things, and so, i hate that i allow you to play me we don’t talk about it, i doubt i’ll ever understand, only resigned to the need to cry; for attachments are addiction, and my brain is wired to be self-destructive they all think we’re together, don’t you see it in their eyes, words, and slights strangers: people watching, even those around us stand by (my mother asks about you.) and so they all wish for our success, or maybe to watch the fall, and for me i don’t doubt, that they can see right through me, that i would live in darkness for your light but you don’t love me like i love you. you don’t love me at all, empty promises, casual statements, you don’t love me, you speak of her, you speak of them, you mention me but you don’t love me. you are my coffee in the morning, my music in the darkness, you make me want to quit (i tried), quit being unhealthy, quit being sad quit loving so easily. up in flames, smoke never seemed so friendly, i’m adjusting to fire, i know it’ll hurt but i’m trying love is cruel, yet beautiful, love is jagged and rough, but, love sounds a lot like unfound quiet, love sounds a lot like smoking